“Clementino”

I’ve mentioned before that there’s a Latino market I go to and the cashier there gives me a discount on the Mexican candy I buy.

I haven’t given the name of the market. Let’s just say it’s called “Clementina’s Latino Market” … Well, Carlos and I didn’t know the name of the male cashier but we always refer to him behind his back as “Clementino” – just because it’s funny.

Well, it’s because of me that “Clementina’s” carries Bubu Lubus. I asked for them early last year, and “Clementino” promised me he’d find them. The next week when I came in, he had the candy waiting for me and has consistently kept them in stock ever since.

Over this past year I’ve come to expect his smile when I come into the store. Over the past few months, I’ve come to expect his joking conversation and the occasional words which could be interpreted as flirtatious but not inappropriate. I thought it was all innocent, though Carlos warned me that he didn’t like the way “Clementino” looked at me. I thought it was all silliness… until today.

Leaving Carlos and the boys waiting in the car, I went in to buy my usual tortillas and Bubu Lubus. Suegra actually came inside with me – she bought a handful of phone cards and left without waiting for me. A young couple sending money via Western Union, and a homeless looking guy buying beer, stood ahead of me in line. I waited patiently until it was my turn and then approached the counter, (which, for reasons unknown to me, is so tall that it comes almost to my chin.)

I put my tortillas on the counter top and pulled two Bubu Lubus from the display. “Clementino” smiled and asked me how I’ve been. I returned the polite conversation as he slid my debit card. Without looking at me he sighed and smiled, then as he waited for the approval he said, “Sabes que, me enamoré de tí.”

I didn’t say anything. I waited for him to talk more – I waited for him to laugh at the joke he was making or for me to realize I had misunderstood. I gave him a quizzical look.

“Te quiero, pero no me quieres, verdad?” he said.

I still said nothing but he kept talking as he laid my receipt and the debit card onto the countertop. When I reached up to take them, he covered my hand with his.

“Es por tu culpa porque eres tan bonita… me entiendes todo que estoy diciendo, sí?”

I nodded, my cheeks burning hot, and pulled my hand away. I accepted my bag of tortillas and candy saying, “Gracias, adiós.”

“Cuándo vas a visitarme otra vez, preciosa?” he said as I walked toward the door.

“Cuándo necesito más Bubu Lubus, pues,” I said laughing.

“Ah, es que no me quieres, verdad?”

I pointed to my wedding ring. “Clementino” shrugged and told me that didn’t matter.

I ran to the car and told Carlos everything that happened, with a smile as I came out of my shock, I admit. Suegra piped up from the back seat that “Clementino” was a “sin vergüenza”, but that I was good for telling my husband. Carlos said “I told you,” multiple times and surprisingly didn’t go back in the market to kill “Clementino” – at least not this time.

And me? I’m feeling like I’m in a real life telenovela… and wondering where the hell I can safely buy my Bubu Lubus now.

___

Clementino Part II

Posted on February 6, 2011, in amor, humor. Bookmark the permalink. 53 Comments.

  1. jajaja eres una roba corazones Tracy!! :P

  2. I cannot understand Spanish, but I have a good idea what he said to you!!! Lord! I guess Carlos was right. Where are you going to get your candy now?

  3. Uuuuyyy la Traaaaysiiii!!! Pobre Clementino, pensó que con Bubu Lubus iba a tener la llave de tu corazón.
    You are one hot mamacita!
    Thanks for the great read!
    (hope Carlos is still keeping things cool… he he)
    Un abrazo!
    Sue

    • jajaja! If I was soltera, maybe I could be won over by Bubu Lubus, but that is not the case!

      Carlos has remained surprisingly calm but más posesivo in a cute way. He used to have major jealousy issues but has worked hard on them this past year – (gracias a Dios, or I’d have a newspaper clipping about his arrest for the attempted murder of “Clementino” to blog about!)

  4. Wow, Tracy! I felt like I was reading a telenovela! What a heartbreaker you are! I just hope you never send Carlos to the store to pick up anything, and whereever are you going to buy your bubu lubas now?!!

    • Carlos will inevitably go back to this Latino market one of these days. Hopefully he’ll just stay calm knowing that he has nothing to worry about.

      This is the closest place that sells Bubu Lubus so we will probably continue to shop there, (but I don’t think I’ll go alone anymore. I don’t want to send the wrong message.)

  5. Awwwwkward! Not surprising (because you ARE one hot mamacita), but yeah, looks like you might have to find another place for your Bubu Lubus fix. Is there anyplace that might sell them online, wholesale? Or you just have to go in with Carlos everytime you buy them. :-) Thanks for bringing a smile to my face today!

    • You can buy them online but I try not to buy too many at once. The more I have, the more I eat. If I only have 2 in the house and I know I won’t be going back to the store for a week, then I take my time eating them ;)

  6. Still laughing. De acuerdo con tu suegra, qué sinvergüenza! However, it´s funny how some don´t care about marital status at all. I guess Clementino will have to nurse a broken heart for Valentine´s. Just don´t show up at his store around that day :)

    • I feel kind of bad for him! LOL… It was an otherwise romantic gesture but the fact that I’m married made it inappropriate. (He is also married!)

      I definitely won’t be showing up on Valentine’s Day!

  7. Maura Hernandez

    Uuuuhhhuuuu La Traaaaiiiiisy! LOL. Too funny. If you want, I am always willing to ship you a box of Bubu Lubus from Chicago, and I promise they won’t come with piropos ;)

    • Thanks, Maura :) I try not to get them in bulk or else I will eat them in bulk. jajaja… Will keep my Chicago connection in mind if there’s ever a shortage in the area though (gracias!)

      As for your Bubu Lubus coming without piropos – LOL – But I kind of like piropos! … Piropos would only be problematic if I decide to act on them, right!?

  8. Jajajaaj!!! Very funny indeed, Traisy!!! My favorite part was how Carlos didn’t go back inside to kill “Clementino”!!! Jajajajaja!!!!!

    Please keep us posted ;)

    • Roxana – That’s my favorite part too since I really don’t have money to bail Carlos out of jail ;)

      Carlos has really come a long way. Do you remember in Miami at QRV when I texted him that there were mariachi at the dinner party? He got really upset and jealous until I texted him a photo as proof that they were FEMALE mariachi. LOL.

    • The Machete!!!!! Bring the machete to the store next time!!! Abusivo!

  9. Hahaha! I can picture this novela so easily, except I’ve added my new twist to it, starting immediately after Clemintino made an ass of himself and I run in the dinky little market….”Ay Senora Lopez! Yo tambien me enamoré de tí, y no me importa si estas casada! Vamos de aqui, a un mundo de Bubu Lubus y high counter tops! Puedemos escuchar Reggaton y leer libros y quedarnos en Twitter todo dia y noche! Dime, quien lo quieres? El…..(you glance at his shocked, yet desperate face) o yo (you see my outstretched hand and awaiting vehicle, a Porche of course)???? (very dramatic music cue!)” Hahahaha! Oh man, I think I have seen too many soap operas.

    • jajajajaja!!!

      Preview of tomorrow night’s episode:

      I grab your hand and we run to the car together with Clementino chasing after us… We’re eating Bubu Lubus and blasting music on the highway, having left Clementino behind in the dust – and then! — A car accident. Next scene – We’re bandaged up in hospital beds beside each other… In my confused and medicated state I admit to you that I’ve been buying Bubu Lubus from 10 different men in the village.

      jajaja… Will “buying Bubu Lubus” now be a euphemism for cheating?

      Rosa: {whispering viciously} There goes, Teresa… Qué cochina!

      Marta: Why do you say that? I thought you were friends?

      Rosa: N’ombre! Haven’t you heard? She was caught *ahem* buying Bubu Lubus from my novio!

      Marta: No me digas!

      Rosa: Sí!

      Marta: What a whore!

  10. uyyy Tracy, yo se que eres “simply irresistible” pero qué abusivo ese tipo Clementino (nombre de cítrico).
    Yo que tu le meto un Bubu Lubus por (por el cu#@*&)donde le quepa!!!

    • jajaja!! … Such outrage!

      You’re making feel guilty for finding it romantic. Carlos said I had the face of a quinceñera when I came out of the store. LOL.

      My apologies to all the women who think Clementino behaved badly … I have to be honest and admit that I love piropos, and this was the best one ever! – Yes, he was very naughty but the important thing is that I’m not naughty, too LOL ;)

  11. Tracy… un piropo “elegante” es eceptable, comparto tu opinión. Es bonito cuando te dicen “Que lindos sus ojos” pero la cosa cambia cuando te dicen eso pero te están viendo el escote o las pompis! Si Clementino lo hizo respetuosamente, ok, sácale el Bubu Lulu del cu*%$# pero si lo hizo así con intención morbosa NO!!! jijijiji

  12. Ay, no!!! I was so waiting for the tragic end to this story, and morbidly relieved it didn´t happen. Well…Bubu Lubus aside, that is.

    There has to be a Part II to this story! Are you ever going back? Is it scary that Carlos is being SO calm about it?? AYD!!! Qué va a pasar?

    Mírala que rompecorazones mi Tracy!

    love u, mama!

    • I will see about posting a Part II. We have to hope it will continue to be non-violent. LOL.

      Carlos’s calmness is sort of freaky – but I think he has channeled his jealousy in a healthy way, (I will explain in Part II… lol.)

      Love you too :)

  13. Ay Tracy- rompe corazones! This is too funny. Glad to know your hubby has taken this rather well.

    Saludos.

  14. Wow! He messed that good thing up….now he’ll never see you again and you’ll be short on your bubu lubu’s for awhile. :)

  15. Wow, Tracy! Did you realize what an effect you were having on Clementino? Apparently Carlos did! I hope you can find your Bubu Lubus elsewhere and can’t wait to read part 2!

    • Micaela, I will admit to being a little flirtatious. I’m shy so it’s subtle and appropriate. Carlos knows this and has warned me I’m playing with fire. LOL… I’m a romantic type and I like the “high” of catching someone’s eye and getting a smile – but nothing more than that!

      As for Clementino – I knew he was always good for a flirtatious look and a smile, but I’m still shocked that he took it to the next level. I guess I’m naive in some ways. I’m not exactly a supermodel so I never expect this sort of thing.

  16. do you eat your Bubu Lubus congelado o de tempuratura ambiente?

  17. Too much telenovelas, my friend!!

  18. Wow! I’m reading these entries backwards and they are just as captivating and juicy this way I can assure you. Uff, what would your novela be called? I am thinking about that one now…

  19. Tracy! You are a trip! Just reading this now!!! Need to go and read part 2 now!

    Thank you for the good laughs!

    You should have known when he made sure to keep the bubu lubus stocked up!!!

    (still laughing)

  20. oh I wish I knew more spanish!
    I only caught a little bit of the conversation…
    he likes you, you’re married, he still likes you is about all I got…. uuurgh.

    • You got it!

      Alright, here’s a translation. I’ll cut and paste the post and change the Spanish dialogue to English:

      I’ve mentioned before that there’s a Latino market I go to and the cashier there gives me a discount on the Mexican candy I buy.

      I haven’t given the name of the market. Let’s just say it’s called “Clementina’s Latino Market” … Well, Carlos and I didn’t know the name of the male cashier but we always refer to him behind his back as “Clementino” – just because it’s funny.

      Well, it’s because of me that “Clementina’s” carries Bubu Lubus. I asked for them early last year, and “Clementino” promised me he’d find them. The next week when I came in, he had the candy waiting for me and has consistently kept them in stock ever since.

      Over this past year I’ve come to expect his smile when I come into the store. Over the past few months, I’ve come to expect his joking conversation and the occasional words which could be interpreted as flirtatious but not inappropriate. I thought it was all innocent, though Carlos warned me that he didn’t like the way “Clementino” looked at me. I thought it was all silliness… until today.

      Leaving Carlos and the boys waiting in the car, I went in to buy my usual tortillas and Bubu Lubus. Suegra actually came inside with me – she bought a handful of phone cards and left without waiting for me. A young couple sending money via Western Union, and a homeless looking guy buying beer, stood ahead of me in line. I waited patiently until it was my turn and then approached the counter, (which, for reasons unknown to me, is so tall that it comes almost to my chin.)

      I put my tortillas on the counter top and pulled two Bubu Lubus from the display. “Clementino” smiled and asked me how I’ve been. I returned the polite conversation as he slid my debit card. Without looking at me he sighed and smiled, then as he waited for the approval he said, “You know, I’ve fallen in love with you.”

      I didn’t say anything. I waited for him to talk more – I waited for him to laugh at the joke he was making or for me to realize I had misunderstood. I gave him a quizzical look.

      “I love you, but you don’t love me, right?” he said.

      I still said nothing but he kept talking as he laid my receipt and the debit card onto the countertop. When I reached up to take them, he covered my hand with his.

      “It’s your fault because you’re so pretty… You understand everything I’m saying, right?”

      I nodded, my cheeks burning hot, and pulled my hand away. I accepted my bag of tortillas and candy saying, “Thanks, bye.”

      “When are you going to visit me again, precious?” he said as I walked toward the door.

      “When I need more Bubu Lubus,” I said laughing.

      “Ah, it’s that you don’t love me, right?”

      I pointed to my wedding ring. “Clementino” shrugged and told me that didn’t matter.

      I ran to the car and told Carlos everything that happened, with a smile as I came out of my shock, I admit. Suegra piped up from the back seat that “Clementino” was a “without shame”, but that I was good for telling my husband. Carlos said “I told you,” multiple times and surprisingly didn’t go back in the market to kill “Clementino” – at least not this time.

      And me? I’m feeling like I’m in a real life telenovela… and wondering where the hell I can safely buy my Bubu Lubus now.

  21. I’m sooooo glad i’ve found ur blog! I feel like we have tons in common and reading your entries have had me rolling in laughter and just captivated my interest! I love your blog!

  22. If I could whistle, I would whistle at this post. My, my! What a gutsy guy!

  23. I used to love walking down the street to the little neighborhood store like we used to have when I was a kid, and they still do in my husband’s home country. One day the owner did something similar to what happened to you, taking hold of my hand when giving me my change, and he said “tienes un cuerpo bien nice, no como las otras bolillas”. So he managed to be both creepy and insulting. I didn’t even tell my husband for months until he figured out I was avoiding the place and demanded to know why. So then he had a severe headache and hardly ate the next two days. He’s made a point of forbidding his sisters to ever set foot in there (needless to say, I don’t need to be told). If it weren’t for needing to stay out of trouble & be able to stay in this country and work, especially for the kids’ sake, I am pretty sure he would have showed this shop owner to have a bit more respect. I know how protective he feels and I feel like I should not have told him. I don’t like to keep secrets from my husband, and he’s my best friend, but by telling him all it did was mess with his head.

    • Ugh – what a gross, rude comment the store owner made to you :p

      I’m terrible at keeping secrets and Carlos always knows when something is up with me. When he knows something is up, he demands to know and won’t rest until he does, so it’s hopeless to hide things – but sometimes I think Carlos would be better off not knowing things like this too. It’s just one of those things that is not really beneficial to have knowledge of usually.

  24. p.s. if it helps you Tracy, I will find Bubu Lubus and I will mail them to you. In our neighborhood you can’t throw a rock and not hit a tiendita. I am sure there must be plentiful Bubu Lubus around us somewhere. I have to find a new favorite tiendita anyway…

    • Awh, thanks, Beth :) We’ve found a couple other markets now and Bubu Lubus have caught on. We find them everywhere now, thankfully!

  1. Pingback: Candy for an Apron? Wordfilled Wednesday -» Viviendo en Dos Idiomas - Living in Two Languages

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