I’ve got some ‘splaning to do

I’m not usually chismosa but I admit it, yesterday I Googled “hijo de Espinoza Paz” … I was CURIOUS, okay? Just curious.

I respect Espinoza’s privacy and blah-blah-blah, but I just wanted to see the cute bebito. So here I am, innocently acting like a tabloid-crazed fan when I should be writing or folding laundry, and here are the Google Images search results I see for “hijo de Espinoza Paz” …

Santa. Mierda. That’s my younger son! The photo is from this post, which doesn’t even mention Espinoza Paz.

Anyway, I just wanted to head off any rumors.

#1. That cute polar bear/child is mine and Carlos’s.
#2. I’ve never even met Espinoza Paz, let alone…
#3. Even if I met Espinoza Paz I doubt he’s into chubby gringas.
#4. IF Espinoza Paz happened to have the same taste as Carlos and he let it be known to me I would say the following:

“I’m sorry, Espinoza, but it isn’t meant to be. I’m happily married. I’m sorry to break your heart, but maybe you can at least get a few good songs out of it? … Can we still be friends?… Actually, I can’t be friends either. You wrote that song ‘Amigos con Derecho’ so it won’t look right, plus my husband, (WHO I’M MADLY IN LOVE WITH), can be a little celoso. I should go… Espinoza, please. Don’t make this harder than it needs to be.” {Pulls his hands off my ankle and walks away.}

Now all that’s left to do is hope Carlos doesn’t read this or I’ll end up on an episode of Maury. At least DNA test results would prove I’m telling the truth. Then I could get all up in his face, “I told you! I TOLD YOU!” … Then Maury would have our Polar Bear/Child brought out where we’d hug him together, Carlos would apologize for having ever doubted my fidelity and we’d live happily ever after.

Pero, sheesh, who would have ever thought Google Images could cause such drama?

Posted on December 13, 2011, in blogging, celebrity, humor, música. Bookmark the permalink. 18 Comments.

  1. I’m cracking up at the fact you think you could just pry his hands off your ankles…:he probably cuffed himself to you, I have a saw of you need it.
    Loved this..and can’t wait to be a audience member on for your Maury debut.

  2. jajajajaja hilarious!!!

  3. HYSTERICAL!!! LOL

    Also thank you for visiting my post over at http://www.kindnessandkisses.com :)

    I am totally in on #SpanishFriday – or at least attempting hard! lol

    xoxo

  4. OMG! This is soo funny! I wonder how that happened, si no mensionaste Espinoza Paz… jajajajaa. I googled it myself, and I saw a picture of Carlos there too… te fijaste? jajaja Carlos toma un jarritos pienso, y otra foto de tu nene, sale comiendo un tamal. Tracy what have you done? hahahahaa, I’m sure everyone (family and freinds)that might come accross that know the truth with out the Maury show.

    • LOL! Well now things are all kinds of complicated. Si Carlos es el hijo de Espinoza, he is secretly Espinoza Jr. … y nuestro hijo, Espinoza III…. jajaja ;)

      It will be really bad if a Spanish-language tabloid gets ahold of this post and takes all the joking literally!

  5. Eehhh corrigeme si me equivoco sos gringa y tu esposo salvadoreño no? Si es asi no entiendo como en esa convinacion cabe musica mexicana..lol
    Soy salvadoreño y con mucha seguridad alla no se esxucha esta clase de musica

    • Hola Juan. Bueno, sí soy gringa, y mi esposo es de El Salvador. Tienes razón.

      La cosa es que me encanta música mexicana – no hay nada más que explicar. Como muchos salvadoreños encantan música en inglés de los Estados Unidos, me encanta música en español de México, El Salvador, Cuba, lo que sea.

      La música no requiere prueba de la nacionalidad – no crees tú?

  6. OMG that is frickin heelarious

    Best.Post.Ever

  7. ROFLMAO!!!! Hahahahaha!!! That is too funny! Nothing like a little baby-papí drama to really make my day. Thanks for the laugh, Tracy!

    Te imaginas si El Gordo de Molina were to find this post??? I can just imagine the headlines! “Espinoza Paz y su hijo con una gringa bien Latina!!!” :)

    Speaking of Espinoza, do you get to watch “La Voz Mexico” in the U.S.? He’s a judge on there and every time I see him, it reminds me of you. And now all I’ll think about is your secret love child. LOL :P

  8. OMG?!!!!! That is craziness! Stupid/funny Google!

  9. This post is why I follow your blog. You are hilarious. Living la vida loca, huh? Thanks for sharing what you stumbled upon! :)

  10. That is way to funny, but I’m espinosa’s real baby momma. Jajajaja (but still a good one)

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